Encouragement Grows Happy Children (It's not the same as Praise!) *

Encouragement Grows Happy Children

It makes a huge difference in your family dynamic when you focus encouraging your child. It's pretty common parenting advice to tell kids when they are being "good"....

Did you know that kids can be told 100x per day "good job" but not feel encouraged at all. Telling a child often that they are "good" can actually push them over into a place of anxiety, worried they will let you down and not be "good" enough.

Let me share just a few more ideas with you before you jump into your video lesson below.

Children have a real need to feel a sense of belonging. This means being accepted in their family, just for who they are, and NOT for how they behave.

Real encouragement focuses on your child's capabilities and effort and helps them believe they belong, every day, all the time.

Children especially need encouragement when they are struggling - words that help them see we care about them and believe in them.

Make a positive impact on your child's behavior and welcome more cooperation by focusing on genuine words of encouragement, even when they are making mistakes or feeling frustrated.

Encouragement sounds like...

  • "I believe you, this is tough for you."
  • "You didn't give up"
  • "That looks tricky, what are you going to try next?"
  • "Do you think there a way to solve this problem?"
  • "I can see you are feeling angry. I can listen to you."
  • "That wasn't easy, we worked it out together."
  • "I appreciate your help."

When a child is misbehaving, have faith that they are capable of learning what to do and give them a chance to do it over. Encourage learning and making amends instead of using punishment or shame.


In what ways can you use encouragement with your child?
How do you help your child feel like they belong to the family?

  • Start noticing moments when you can be a voice of encouragement to your child.
  • Spot improvement and effort.
  • Look for the good in your child and notice how capable your child really is.
  • Instead of noticing what your child is doing wrong, celebrate improvements and find opportunities for encouraging your child to do better.

Do you have any questions about how to use encouragement to transform unhelpful behaviors into capability?